Archive for February 16th, 2010

My Bloody Valentine (2009)

by on Feb.16, 2010, under Daily Review

I thought these remakes where supposed to be smart and appreciative of the original adding a little modern magic and superior camerawork and new filmmaking techniques? After the Friday 13th rehash and this, I’m left disheartened.

The original story has been broken and obliterated and replaced with something more complex which has left all sorts of holes in the plot. You can wave goodbye to suspense, cleverness, realistic script and strong characters and welcome in average youthful TV actors, over the top violence (Which soon becomes tiresome after the third pickaxe through the head) and storyline which involves several introductions of non important characters only to be slayed by the hand of the killer miner which just leaves the viewer caring even less for the main characters and scratching ones head wondering what these people have to do with the killers motive. Nothing! Sorry for the spoiler, but most of these deaths are really not import for motive. In fact, the whole film makes no sense. The hundreds of heart shaped boxes in the lodge? Really? Nonsense. It’s just boring and I’m not saying this lightly. It really is boring. Even the tricks used for 3D death and gore soon get tiresome.

It’s not entirely surprising though with Patrick Lussier in the driving seat. White Noise 2? Dracula 2000?  Please don’t let this fool have control of Halloween 3. But it was probably Todd Farer who ruined this film with such a mess of a screenplay. (again, involved in Halloween 3. Noooo!)

Jensen Ackles and Kerr Smith are really the only thing holding this film together and really struggling with lack of direction and a poor script, and cringing at the supporting roles, especially the bloody dreadful Jaime King. The gore is good for the most part, but there is no suspense, so when the pickaxe swings into view there’s no real surprise and there’s only so many times we can see a axe through a different part of the head without becoming desensitised.

This is a different film to the original. The basic story is similar, but without all of the originality and creativity of the original team. Skip this and go straight for the 82 classic, it will not disappoint. Even without the 3D.

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